Guest Blog: Point of View from the Mother of the Groom

Where Do I Start?

What kind of dress do you wear?

From my personal experience, picking out my dress was an easy one. It was pure luck and great timing. I didn’t know what style I was and it turned out to be a combination of modern and elegant and I narrowed down three dresses within 45 minutes. What was truly important for me is to getting my future daughter-in-law’s approval and that my dress was ultra-comfortable and I got both.

What is your style – modern, glamorous, classic, romantic, elegant, over-the-top, or are you not even sure? If you do choose a dress, it is highly advisable not to choose anything that can be considered over-the-top. Even if your son or daughter is a rock star or Lady Gaga, your dress should be just one level simpler. Your dress should not look similar to the bride’s, or the other Mom’s dress for obvious reasons, but you also do not want to clash with the bride’s vision. There are thousands of dresses to choose from so the following tips may help you narrow down your choices:

Modern – look for clean lines with a unique neckline, color should be unique and accessories do not have to match the dress. Your dress should be easily worn again at a modern art museum gala or even another wedding with simpler jewelry and accessories.

Glamorous – a toned down version of going to the Oscars is the look for you. Do not show too much skin, but explore dresses with one shoulder strap or a halter top. You need not borrow your diamonds from Tiffany or Harry Winston, but diamonds, or similar gems, should make great accessories. Again, this can be worn again at a posh event where you can lose the jacket or shawl.

Classic – this style of dress is a simple style but can be in a striking color like salmon or teal. A suit or non-trendy dress will suffice with pearls and low heels or sandals. This outfit can be worn again at a fundraiser, luncheon or a holiday party by just changing the accessories.

Romantic – Silk, chiffon and ruffles are good features to look for and you want to pull out that old broach or the earrings your hubby gave you for your first anniversary to add as sentiments. This can be worn again at a fundraising event or wedding anniversary party.

Elegant – A mixture or taffeta, silk and lace might be involved, a jacket or shawl to cover the arms, pearls and diamonds are the perfect jewelry. The skirt or bottom half may be a simple cut but the jacket or top may be slightly off the shoulder. Like the other dresses, this can worn again at special occasions with a slight change of jewelry or jackets.

If you don’t know what style looks best on you, and you have no experience being the Mom of the Groom or Bride, do what a bride does. Make an appointment at a bridal salon and try on several gowns of style and color. Do you need to buy one as soon as possible? Yes, if the wedding is less than six months away and need to be ordered. If you are shopping at a department store, you can buy it right then and there or wherever available.

If you decide to wear a shorter dress, make sure it is knee-length or below. Since your feet will show more, make sure to wear a visually appealing pair of shoes. It is also not unusual these days to have a second pair to change into for comfort after a few dances.

You can still apply the above styles even for casual beach or outdoor weddings. You may replace the material with cotton, silk or gauzy, colorful textures but keep the elegance keeping the event in mind.

This is one of the most important days of your child’s life and you should look beautiful. You want to look “presentable” but in your own style and personality. What is the big deal about the Mom’s dress? Your dress is just as important as the bridal parties’ wardrobe, and other than the bride and groom, the parents’ role is highly respected when their children are taking this huge step in their lives. This is not her basketball game or his track meet you’re going to, this is THE day.

It’s Not Just the Dress

Use professionals, if possible, to apply makeup and hair. The main reason is you want to look good for almost 12 hours straight. Professionals know what makeup or hair products to use to sustain your look for that long with minimal application from you during the festivities.

Let the florist know ahead of time what kind of corsage you prefer to have – a wrist or a pinned corsage to better suit your dress. It’s a little difficult to pin a corsage on certain dresses.

Keep the balanced look in mind. Be poised, and no slouching for the first few hours at least. Putting up your feet and relaxing in the last hour or two is very excusable. One of the worst accessories is too much drinking. It’s great to celebrate and dance the night away but no matter how beautiful you look, you will simply not look very “balanced” acting silly or passed out. Digital cameras are everywhere and you do not want that photo taken. So drink water or soda in between to keep hydrated.

Final Tip

The final tip is once you have narrowed down your choices to a few dresses, ask the bride to help you choose. It will make her feel respected and if it happens to be your future daughter-in-law, she will definitely appreciate it. If it’s your daughter, she will appreciate any time she has with you before she officially leaves your home, and that her opinion matters. If it’s your son, just show your final set of choices by showing him photos even if he has an opinion or not. He will still appreciate your enthusiasm and participation on his important day.

BBFN (Bridal Bliss For Now), 

Adel Domingo 

(Guest Blogger)